Taken out of context

Guess what this article is about (from the New York Times):

When I pull into rest stops, I see the same guys in the bathroom I'd see at hub airports.

You guessed it! The gay rest stop culture of Long Island. Oh, no, wait... it's about summer travel.

Maybe they should try Karaoke instead...

Perhaps a nice rendition of "I touch myself" would calm the nice people of Encino down.

After all, everyone knows those film stars love karoake.

How to be a man...

Should a schlub that looks like this really be writing books about "How to be a man"?!

Here's an excerpt from his "Alphabet of Manliness":

D: Dorky goatee. An essential to looking like a total toolbox of
manliness. See my picture for explanation.

And yes, I am just jealous that he has a book deal and I do not.

Tuesday's LA band you should know: Helen Stellar

For Tuesday, the random LA band that I think you should know about is (drum roll, please)... Helen Stellar.
You can give them a listen here. For starters, I love the song "Panic attack at breakfast." The lyrics accurately describe the roller-coaster of emotional that I've seen in some of my own friends as they alternate between a paralyzing crisis of confidence and joyful fearlessness. "Diane" from the Below Radar EP is also a great track.

In general, I think they described themselves pretty well on their own website:

HELEN STELLaR has laid claim to a brave and beautiful sonic niche combining the best elements of space-aged electronica and legendary rock 'n' roll.

Brave and beautiful. Strong words. I'm not normally a huge "shoegaze" fan, but if this is shoegaze, then count me in. I'll be the one at the show checking out your battered Chuck Taylor's.

And in the vein of coincidental run-ins, I've also had a random brush with Helen Stellar. I was already a big fan, thanks to the "I'm naut what I seem" EP, and so I was buying their first EP (The Newton EP) at Amoeba. The clerk at the counter says to me, "You do realize that Helen Stellar's lead singer just walked right behind you?" No, I did not realize, though I should have recognized Jim Evens' distinctive haircut. I definitely should have taken that opportunity to get an autograph on my EP, because I would like it if someone asked me for an autograph, but I didn't. For shame, Navin. That autographed EP would have been worth dollars when HS hits it big.

And hit it big they just might, with their new double album coming out May 16 on Cameron Crowe's label Vinyl Films. Jump on the bandwagon while you still can.

Random LA band you should know: Silversun Pickups

I don't pretend to know much about the underground or unsigned LA music scene, but occasionally even I stumble across an up-and-coming young band that really strikes a chord. And so let me do my part in spreading the word about my occasional finds with you, dear reader.

Without further ado, Monday's randomly awesome band you should know: The Silversun Pickups.

I am a huge fan of the track Kissing Families (and not just because I'm married to my first cousin), as well as the song Creation Lake, which can be found on their EP Pikul. I'd call their music lo-fi, featuring some growling guitars interspersed with delicate melodies.

But the true reason that I will forever love the SSPU is that I saw them play at an EP release party at Echo Park's wonderful Sea Level Records. Sure, they put on a good show (while the lead singer swigged scotch in between songs), but more importantly, they brought beer. Any band that brings me beer and plays good music gets major props from Thermos.

You can also give their music a listen on MySpace (no self-respecting band can live without a MySpace page).

Tijuana, anyone?

I think Spring Break in Cancun just became even more fun:

Mexican President Vicente Fox will sign a bill that would legalize the use of nearly every drug and narcotic sold by the same Mexican cartels he's vowed to fight during his five years in office, a spokesman said Tuesday....And the per-person amounts approved for possession by anyone 18 or older could easily turn any college party into an all-nighter: half a gram of coke, a couple of Ecstasy pills, several doses of LSD, a few marijuana joints, a spoonful of heroin, 5 grams of opium and more than 2 pounds of peyote, the hallucinogenic cactus.

Really, that all sounds OK to me except for the peyote. 2 frickin' pounds? This will even more credence to one of my favorite insults: peyote-eater.

Read the whole thing here.

I love my job

Sometimes, you just have to step back for a second and laugh, while reading the following reference:
Journal of Mammary Gland Biology and Neoplasia 2003 Apr;8(2):145-58

Ah, J Mammary Gland Biol. Hasn't every 12-year old hetero male aspired to some day read your articles? Don't let anyone tell you that dreams never come true.

P.S. I swear that's why "mammary gland" was on autocomplete in my Google searchbar.

Coachella 2006: A review in brief

Ah, the Coachella hangover, 2006 edition. It's taken me until today to even think about posting on this, given the fatigue from my annual trek into the desert.

Not that I'm asking for your sympathy (my parents certainly gave me none when I told them I was tired at work on Monday) - the festival was awesome: warm but not scorching heat, a slew of awesome acts, a coterie of international music fans, and a general lack of sunburn made for a great weekend.

If you weren't there, this is an amazingly complete run-down of the show. Honestly, I can't imagine how this guy saw all of those sets - I was knackered just from seeing about half of those acts.

But no matter how much I enjoyed Coachella '06, there are always the haters: this is definitely one of the worst reviews I've read - it's New York snobbery, looking down their noses at Cali, at its best.

My personal highlights:
- The Zutons: I was totally wrong about these guys - they rock, even if they are Brits.

- Jamie Lidell: I've written about this guy before, and he was every bit as incredible in the desert. He even added some theatrical perfomance art to the music. And he wore a raincoat, because it was sunny and 95 F.

- Daft Punk: All I've got to say about this act is summed up here.
- Ted Leo / Pharmacists: "Cigarettes and speed for living, sleeping pills to feel forgiven." A great set, even if I had to sit down in the middle of it. Plus, he looks vaguely like my friend Goose.

- Franz Ferdinand: Second time I've seen these guys, and they were perfect rocking out music for the vastness of the desert. Only 40' remain.
- Amadou & Mariam: Apparently, they are blind. I def. did not pick up on that during the show. Too busy dancing with all the afro-beat stoners, I suppose.
- Ladytron, My Morning Jacket, and The Scissor Sisters: A case of perfect timing - I only saw about 4 songs from each of these bands, but still managed to hear my personal favorite tunes from each of them.

My only real regret: missing the opportunity to perv on The Like. Well, that and staying at that sketchy motel.